Thursday, October 11, 2012

I found answers to my questions...and more

I signed up for the Alpha Course looking for answers:
“Is there more to life than this?  How can we have faith?  Who is Jesus?
I also signed up to meet new people and be integrated into the family of the church.
These answers were all found;  I met many new folk and was welcomed to BMC with open arms. What I did not expect was that I would meet the best friend I would ever share my life with.  The Holy Spirit.

I was struggling with the fact that my youngest daughter had been a run-away since she was 16 after I went through a very nasty divorce.  She would re-appear, stay with us for a while, then disappear again. Often we did not know where she was for days/months.
At the same time my eldest daughter was growing up and taking the plunge of leaving home and moving into her own place.

This was absolutely devastating for me.  The 2 young people that I had brought up on my own, and shared my life with were gone!!  I was totally addicted to my children and couldn’t function without them.  I was depressed, sad all the time and had no desire to go on living.
My wonderful husband Rob, who many of you know, has been a pillar of strength to me, but he also, at times, had no answers.

The Holy Spirit gave me the strength to understand that my children are individuals and I had to learn to let them go and begin their own lives without me.  I had, after all, equipped them for life.
I learnt how to pray, to ask God to give me strength to continue loving them, but set them free.
After many agonizing months I have managed to live without being “tied to their apron strings”  They have both developed into wonderful happy young adults, who have their own lives and their own relationships.  The relationship between my youngest & I is better than it ever was before.  Rob & I are so proud of both of them.

I often sit alone in my garden during quiet time, knowing that my girls are safe and happy and that I will never feel that desperate loneliness again, as I am not alone. The Holy Spirit is and will always be with me.
I look so forward to facilitating Alpha and pray that you will find the peace of heart that I did, no matter what you are going through at this time. - Di Heath